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  • Writer's pictureJames McGee

'Religion was invented when the first con man met the first fool' - Mark Twain (allegedly)


Allow me to introduce Kenneth Copeland. Not heard of him? Don't worry he probably hasn't heard of you either, unless he's tried to fleece you out of your hard-earned savings.


Copeland is a Televangelist, that's polite speak for one of those loud-mouthed, fire and brimstone conmen who hold their palm up to the TV screen to try and convince their congregation that they are the Almighty's spokesperson on earth, usually while demanding their gullible followers put hands in pockets in order to subsidize their pastor's lavish lifestyle, which often includes - I sh*t you not - a fleet of private aircraft and, in Copeland's case, his own airport. Yes, you read that correctly: his own airport.


You won't be at all surprised to learn that Kenneth Copeland Ministries is based in Texas and that he is anti-vax, so much so that he is asking for his viewers to help him buy yet another private jet (his ministry already owns at least five) in order that he can avoid COVID vaccine mandates to travel. He also hates flying commercial because people often try to engage him in conversation. Shock, horror.


In a broadcast a few years ago, he defended the use of private jets as a necessary part of his ministry, comparing flying in a commercial plane to getting 'in a long tube with a bunch of demons'.


Nice.


During the height of the outbreak in the US in 2020, Copeland stated that Covid was merely a weak strain of the flu and that fear of it was a sin and putting faith in the devil. The pandemic, he claimed, would soon end. He also said that he could cure his followers of the disease and that they should continue paying tithes to the church if they lost their jobs in the economic crisis that the pandemic caused.


If you want a real laugh you should watch the video where he's drawing down the 'Wind of God' to destroy the virus. Click on the image left if you wanna take a look.



Any attempt to insert a joke here about the Almighty's flatulence should not be considered for fear of excommunication.


Any road, Copeland said recently:


'The time has come for ministries, particularly travelling ministries, to have some other method of travel other than the airlines. You get into this situation where we're not going to let you fly unless you're vaccinated. Well, to me that's the mark of the beast.'


Has he considered broomsticks...?


Yep, truly, a prince among men.


Not sure who the other dingbats are. Could be the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse who've popped in for a visit, for all I know, though to my mind it looks more like an audition by, quite possibly, the worst boy band in history. I don't think Take That have anything to worry about.







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